Morning Of Mourning
by RavenWriter1886
Summary: After Madam Red's death, Sebastian attempts to comfort a very distraught Ciel, and realizes that he does in fact experience emotions.


**Disclaimer: **Yana Toboso is the owner of Kuroshitsuji and its characters. I am not.

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**Author's Note: **I know that I'm currently working on a chapter story right now, but I had written a short story earlier this week, and I decided to re-

write it and upload it. As always, instructive criticism is welcome! I'd love to see some reviews. This story takes place a few hours after Madam Red

was killed. Warning: This is yaoi.

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**Morning Of Mourning**

** T**he only sound that could be heard inside of the small carriage was the muffled noise of horses' hooves colliding with cobblestone. The two males that occupied the carriage - Ciel Phantomhive and his butler, Sebastian Michaelis - hadn't exchanged a word since they began their journey home. The awkward silence between the two was unnerving not only to the young earl, but to his servant as well. Sebastian watched as his master stared tiredly out the window, seemingly avoiding his questioning gaze. He was uncertain as to what mood the boy was in, as he'd never experienced human-like emotions. Whatever the master was experiencing, however, couldn't be pleasant. The child had just seen his only remaining family member slaughtered before his very eyes. Sebastian winced at the memory of Ciel's horrified expression during the murder. A protective instinct came over him for only a moment, but was gone as soon as it had appeared. He tucked a loose strand of dark hair behind one ear, his eyes fixated on the boy. He wished he had a better understanding of humans. Perhaps then he could find some way to comfort the child, who seemed to be going to great lengths in order to mask his emotions.

"It's acceptable to grieve, you know" Sebastian said loudly, his voice breaking the long-lasting silence. Ciel jumped as if he had forgotten that there was another person in the carriage. Quickly, he turned away from the window and looked confusedly at his butler, pulling his coat tighter around himself.

"I don't know what you mean" he mumbled, looking him in the eye. Sebastian kept his serious expression as he once again began to talk.

"It's understandable for you to be upset by a loved one's de -"

"I'm not upset" Ciel interrupted, irritated by the idea of what Sebastian was saying. To admit that he was upset was essentially the same thing as admitting he was human, and he refused to do so. Sebastian was amused by his young master's obvious lie.

"If you say so, young master." Ciel's mouth twitched in anger.

"How dare you doubt my words!" he cried.

"Madam Red was merely a pawn in my game. A king does not mourn the loss of a pawn." Sebastian couldn't help but to smirk at Ciel's fake nonchalance towards the whole situation. The boy quickly resumed staring out the window at the night sky after this outburst, his face slightly flushed. They rode like this until Phantomhive manor became visible over the gently-rolling hills.

"We're nearly there, young master" Sebastian informed him, still attempting to understand his strange behavior.

"I can see the manor from here, Sebastian. I'm not daft." He shot a glare towards his servant. Sebastian merely smiled.

"Shall I prepare a hot bath for you once we arrive? You seem cold." "I'm fine". As soon as the carriage came to a halt outside the manor, Ciel opened the door and dashed away in to the house, leaving Sebastian behind. He stepped out of the carriage and followed Ciel's path to the main entrance of the manor, where the door stood ajar.

"How irresponsible of you, young master" Sebastian whispered, though no one could hear him save for himself. He thought that he saw Ciel making his way up the staircase up ahead, but he wasn't too certain, as it was dark. He continued upstairs to the young earl's bathroom, where he drew the boy's bath, folding fresh clothing for afterwards. Sebastian then proceeded to go to Ciel's room and knock against the door.

"Young master? Your bath is ready." The door automatically opened, as if Ciel had been waiting for him.

"Sebastian" he mumbled. The child's hair was a mess, the longest pieces falling down across his face. He was still wearing Sebastian's overcoat (Sebastian had put it on him while they were waiting for "Jack the Ripper" to make his appearance), and in one hand was a large bottle of champagne. The child shook his bangs out of his eyes, revealing a tear-streaked face. Whatever Sebastian had been expecting, it wasn't this. He knelt down to Ciel's level, an emotion similar to concern visible in his crimson eyes.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" he asked, worried. He knew that what the boy had experienced as a child was simply horrific, and yet somehow he'd managed to stay sane. Another incident like that, however, could have possibly sent him around the bend. Instead of answering, Ciel burst in to another fit of tears and wrapped his small arms around Sebastian's neck. For the first few seconds of this unusual display, Sebastian was rather stiff, as he wasn't used to such physical contact with Ciel, or with anyone for that matter. He eventually loosened up a bit, returning the embrace as he did so. Ciel continued to sob in to his shoulder, allowing Sebastian to stroke his hair and whisper comforting phrases in to his ear. He felt his butler lift him up and set him down on his bed. Sebastian then stood before him helplessly, trying to find something else comforting to say, but unable to do so.

"Hold me" he heard Ciel whisper through the tears, and Sebastian obeyed. He sat down on the bed beside his master, pulling the child against his chest and wrapping his arms around his small back. After a few minutes, Sebastian noticed the bottle of champagne was left on the boy's nightstand, reminding him of something he'd been meaning to say.

"I never knew that you were much of a drinker" he mumbled, staring down at Ciel, who was trying to compose himself after his tearful outburst. Ciel let out a small laugh as he looked up in to Sebastian's eyes.

"I'm not. It's just... It was Madam Red's favorite. She was the only person other than me who drank it." Ciel was obviously uncomfortable talking about his deceased aunt, and instead of saying anything else, he nestled his face in between Sebastian's head and shoulder. The demon watched the small boy curiously. It was strange how humans' emotions changed so quickly. Earlier he was angry, a few moments ago he was upset, and now... Sebastian was unsure about Ciel's current emotion. He reached a hand around him and rubbed his back, breathing in the strong scent of his soap. He secretly enjoyed this. Sebastian wasn't exactly sure what about it he enjoyed, but he knew he liked something about the feel of his young master's small body in his arms.

"I'm sorry" Ciel mumbled in to his shoulder, and Sebastian rested his head atop the child's as he began to speak.

"You needn't be. You've done nothing wrong. One can't help what they feel, especially in situations such as yours."

"I didn't mean that" Ciel whispered, lifting his head up ever so slightly.

"I mean that I'm sorry for everything, for not treating you the way you deserve to be treated, for being a brat at times. I'm so sorry, Sebastian. Do forgive me." Sebastian was momentarily shocked by what he was hearing. He'd never heard the child apologize to him before.

"It's quite alright" Sebastian responded, and a smile spread across his face as he said this.

"Do you hate me?" Ciel asked, his voice sounding slightly timid, as if he were afraid of the answer.

"I could never hate you" the butler whispered, and he knew that what he said was true. He saw Ciel smile after he spoke. The two sat like this for quite awhile, and eventually, Ciel dozed off. Sebastian just sat there smiling, watching as his master slept in his arms.

"I could never hate you" he repeated, and he realized that for the first time in his many years, he was experiencing a true emotion.

"Goodnight, Ciel" he whispered, and he held the sleeping boy in his arms until the sun rose.


End file.
